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“My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)

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21-30 Quotations of 116

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“We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
Similar Quotes. About: Marriage quotes, Wives quotes, Relationships quotes.
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“I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“My uncle's dying wish - he wanted me on his lap. He was in the electric chair.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing at me.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“I get no respect. The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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“I'm so ugly - My mother had morning sickness - After I was born”
Rodney Dangerfield quotes (American Comedian, 1921-2004)
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