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    I Like this quote I dislike this quoteYour modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro.

 Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quoteThe problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winter.

 Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quoteCrabgrass can grow on bowling balls in airless rooms, and there is no known way to kill it that does not involve nuclear weapons.

 Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quoteIt always rains on tents. Rainstorms will travel thousands of miles, against prevailing winds for the opportunity to rain on a tent.

 Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quoteIf God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would have made them cute and furry.

 Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)

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    I Like this quote I dislike this quoteScientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.

 Dave Barry quotes (American Writer and Humorist best known for his weekly newspaper column. b.1947)

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